My Journey, My Voice, My choice!

My life, issues, thoughts and voice

Sunday, November 19, 2006

God's Challenge.

Well, I recently read a blog about god challenging us… the question “what is god challenging you about?” Well, that has stuck in my head!
How is god challenging me? Well, there is everyday life which has mini challenges, but I am talking HUGE challenges! I mean life altering ones… well, my immediate reaction to that question was change… not that change is my challenge but my reaction to change is my challenge. In bible study Liam said this story/moral thingy.. I may get this wrong but this is what I remember:

“Once upon a time a daughter complained to her father that her life was miserable and that she didn't know how she was going to make it.
Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Once the three pots began to boil, he placed potatoes in one pot, eggs in the second pot and ground coffee beans in the third pot.
He then let them sit and boil, without saying a word to his daughter. The daughter, moaned and impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing. After twenty minutes he turned off the burners. He took the potatoes out of the pot and placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. He then ladled the coffee out and placed it in a cup. Turning to her, he asked:
"Daughter, what do you see?"
"Potatoes, eggs, and coffee," she hastily replied.
"Father, what does this mean?" she asked.
He then explained that the potatoes, the eggs and coffee beans had each faced the same adversity-the boiling water. However, each one reacted differently. The potato went in strong, hard, and unrelenting, but in boiling water, it became soft and weak. The egg was fragile, with a hard shell, making people believe it was tough, invincible, ect but really it was just soft and vulnerable inside. However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were exposed to the boiling water, they changed the water and created something new.
"Which one are you," he asked his daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean?"

In life, things happen around us, things happen to us, but the only thing that truly matters is what happens within us. Which one am I? Which one are you? When problems come (as they will) how will we react?
Will they make us weak, hard hearted or will they cause us to change into something worthwhile?”

So that’s what was read out at bible study a few weeks ago, and now, I think about it, plus god challenge and I think, well, what am i? Am I accepting gods challenge and turning his change into something good? Or… am I just refusing everything, giving god a cold shoulder? How can I tell what’s god and what’s not? Hmm… so much to think about... what do you think? Let me know!

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Be careful what you wish for?

Ever wished for something so bad, and then gotten it, and then realised that really what you were wishing for is NOT what you wanted?

Wished you would get sick so you wouldnt hav eot go to school and gotten sick the friday night?
Wished it would rain so you culd get out of the gardening, and it pours wen your suposed to be going out?

Well, that's where i am now, i wished, i prayed so hard for something, and now I have it, its all mine, everything i was wishing for, only now, i dont want it, i wish i could take it all back! I wish i could go back in time and erase the last 8 weeks!

I dunno, i supose as the saying goes...
"be careful what you wish for!"

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Random writing!

I wrote this today, dunno why, just started writing after my english exam (which i did okay-ish in), this is what i came up with, what do you think?

She is scared, alone and miserable, she knows that the only one person cares, she knows that no-one else does, she is sitting in the corner wishing that someone were here, here to hug her, here to hold her, here to tell her she will be ok!

That some-one is almost here, lose. but not close enough, they are so close , just in the distance, she can see teir shadow, she can see the tiny ray of light they give off, she can just see them, they are hear to save her, they walk towards her, she struggles, she pulled through the pain, the anguish, she pulled through it all to be here, she pulled through all the trials she was given, she reaches out to them, they look at her, they look so utterly ashamed, so disappointed, so embarassed.
The hatred just pours out; they feel discraced by her, dishonoured by her, she looks at them, she is on her knees, her face is stained by tears, she cries out, one last cry, just before she dies, she cries out, she reaches out her hand, they look at her, the look of compassion: gone, they look at her, the look of love: GONE, they look at her, they see her desperation, they realise they are her only hope, and so...

The turn their backs and walk away! They crush her dying spirit...

Friday, November 03, 2006

3 realisations

So... eva been in a situation where everything just goes wrong?
Well, that's been my week, i think that 2nite is the only time i have began 2 relex since tuesday arvo... HOWEVER... i think i have pulled muscles in my back, sprained my wrist and possibly broken my elbow... great huh?

So when everything goes absolutly wrong, the slightest thing canm seem magical? Like, a really small comment, a message when you didnt think it would come? I dunno, i just had a shocking week, like BAD... but i realised 3 things, and they are:

1. Things aren't always as they seem, good and bad...
2. If u ask 4 help wit 1 thing u can't expect help with another! (confusing i no)
3. Pain, both emotional and pysical can lead you to the right place, but can also lead u to the wrong thing...

I dunno...